I Hate Summer

I seriously hate summer. Seriously the worst season. Super big sun and unbearable heat. It's hot anytime of the day. Most of all, it makes me sweat. I hate to sweat. Sweating causes skin irritation. For the past few days, my skin has been flaring with rashes and itches like mad. Because it itches so badly, I've been scratching and that resulted in sores /lesions. I seriously don't get how people can enjoy basking in the sun. I, for one, hate being under the sun. I would avoid it at all cause. If there is anything I hate more than betrayal, that would be the sun. Why do I have to have sensitive skin? Why do I have to be born into the wrong skin? Oh, sweating makes me temperamental. Who doesn't become temperamental when you are scratching yourself like a monkey?

Narrow Escape

14 May 2014, around 7.30 pm. I escaped serious injury. Minutes earlier, I was seated on the chair. I stood up, picked up the glass of orange juice, and was drinking. Suddenly the tower of heavy boxes behind me came crashing down, with a loud crash, boom, bang. Narrowly missing me. It crash landed inches to my left. The impact of the crash caused items on top of the boxes to land nicely on the table. The impact also caused the first box to rip. Had I not stood up, my back would have snapped from the mass of falling heavy boxes and I would have been hospitalised as a result. I am indeed a lucky girl.

Garlic

Having headache after consuming some garlic. It's not even one whole garlic. Just some sprinkled on the food. Happens every time when I eat food like garlic bread or garlic naan. Whole body is heated up now. Headache.

Point To Ponder

Some say a daughter is a man's liver in his past life. Some say a father is a girl's first love. The truth is, a parent will love their child as long as they live. T

Doctor

Once, I went to the doctor because of a horrible sore throat that lead to extreme ear pain when I swallow, be it food or drink. The sore throat- ear pain was so bad that it's a feat in itself to speak. After relaying the "problem" to the doctor, he instructed me to open my mouth and stuck the "ice-cream stick" into my mouth to see how bad it was. He then proceeded to "shine" my ear with a flashlight. After that, he remained silent. He didn't tell me how bad my condition is nor what he thinks is the problem. Instead, he picked up his pen and was really engrossed in drawing. He drew a diagram of the ear, and started filling it up, like he's sitting for a biology exam. There I was, sitting there waiting for his response, while watching in awe an artistic performance by a doctor. I waited, and waited but there was no response from him. I interrupted his Leonardo Da Vinci performance to ask him about my diagnosis. I asked whether there is a pus in my ear. He looked up from his masterpiece, not happy that I interrupted his concentration and said no. I was then sent out to wait for my medication. I had to wait for over half an hour to get my medication from the dispensary, but I was the only patient in the clinic. When I finally collected my medicine, I was told that they are out of medicated ear drops and I was told to get it from a pharmacy ( which was next to the clinic). After going through so much hassle, only to get prescribed panadol (tablet form @ round ones that I hate because it's difficult to swallow. Prefer caplets @ oblong ones) and the name of the medicated ear drops scribbled on a post-it. I could have just walked into the pharmacy and bought the ear drops and save my time of waiting. That's the first time I've seen a doctor so immerse in drawing on the tiny piece of patient's diagnosis card. Usually we only see horrible, non readable handwriting on the card. A friend said the reason doctors write in horrible handwriting is so that patient and their family/ friend/ companion can't read what is written on the patient's card. That is why the nurse enters when the patients leave the room so that the doctor can explain what to give to the patients.

Neck

Have been having trouble sleeping. When I do drift into sleep, my body doesn't really rest. My neck really hurts and it's making me feverish. No matter how I crack it, it doesn't relief the pain. My head, neck and body really hurts badly. Besides that, my face is also having cramps as a result of me gritting my teeth daily, to control my emotions and to withstand the body pain. Make it stop already. Stop torturing me. Just go away.

Topple

According to a show, just find things to do as distraction, to get your mind off things. Quoting it: "mo yeh wan yeh lei cho". So I decided to get a little domesticated, by mopping the floor. Filled a bucket with water and started my "activity". When I was done, I placed the mop into the bucket of dirty water. I gave the bucket a push. Just then the bucket decided to topple, spilling the dirty water all over the place. Face palm . The water flowed everywhere. I gave a squeal. Had to rush to get rags to dry the place. All my hard work down the drain. Stupid bucket.

Sleepless

It's 3am. I'm sleepless. Whenever I close my eyes, flashes of things I want to forget keep replaying in my mind. In need of a new environment. Being here just suffocates me. Being here keeps reminding me of Everything that I wish to get rid of, from my memory. It's driving deeper into depression. Don't want to go through this anymore. God, if you really do exist, please bring me away.

Extreme Backache

12 April 2014, 2.22am. Can't sleep due to severe backache. The pain is never before felt. Right pelvic hurts badly. The entire right side of my back hurts badly.

Migraine

Have been having migraine the whole day. It's so persisting that even after taking medicine, it wouldn't go away. Besides that, there are two giant ulcers on both sides of my throat. Feeling a little feverish and a little nausea. I suppose this is the punishment for being the longest April's Fool / the fool for the longest time. Foolish for believing over and over.

Things That Can't Be Expressed 4

Thought that I was having a cardiac arrest this morning. My chest felt like it was going to explode. Couldn't breathe properly. Could neither stand nor lie down. Grit my teeth and forced myself up. While brushing my teeth, had another vomit round. Nothing came out though. Haven't been able to sleep for the past few weeks. Each time I lie down to sleep, my whole body would ache. The pain is so bad, it's as though I've internal injuries as a result of being beaten up. My bones are aching, my neck is stiff. There's no position or amount of cushion used that can enable me to be a little comfortable while sleeping. Every night I just grit my teeth and force some sleep. Still feeling uncomfortable in the chest. How much longer do I have to suffer? Why are you so unfair? Did I slain an entire nation in my past life for you to torture me this way, in this life?

Thoughtful

Last night, I received 2 voice messages from a friend in UK. He asked me how was my Christmas.  It's so thoughtful of him to think of me and my well being even though he is busy. I teared when I got the messages. Someone so far away thought of me and cared enough to send regards. Whilst someone near couldn't be bothered to reply. Thank you dear friend for always being there and lending an ear. God bless you and merry Christmas.

Tee Hee

18 November 2013. Bought a bag yesterday. Went out without an intention to get anything but ended up buying a bag. Pretty happy with the bag but having doubts about the colour. Wondering should I exchange it for another colour? A safer colour? I like that the colour is sharp but worried it doesn't go with my existing clothes. What should I do?

...

Touching

A few simple words that is touching yet sad.

The End Of Something

Even though the outcome was anticipated, deep down inside, there was a hopeful feeling, that it isn't so. The meaning finally sunk in after seeing it in tangible form. Albeit knowing that it would turn out this way, the feeling of disappointment is inevitable.