Prayers Answered

Dear God,

I knew I could always count on you for every intricate detail in my life. I know you will always be there for me. You will always have my back and pick me up when I fall. I know that you will be there to dry my tears when I cry and put a smile back on my face. I know you are always willing to listen to me. To walk with me, every step of my life. To hold my hand and give me courage. You are the only one who truly loves with no condition. Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for lifting a boulder off my chest, enabling me to breathe. Thank you for showing me the right path to take.I wouldn't know what to do if I don't have you in my life. My life is richer when you are in it. No words can describe my gratitude towards you. Thank you for your unconditional love. Thank you for coming to my rescue when I am in need. Thank you for everything.



Amen.

Miserable

The past month and a half has been the most miserable time of my entire life. All the unpleasant times in my life added up would be much pleasant than the past month. It is truly a horrible nightmare.


It has resulted in me not eating and sleeping well. I have developed some kind of eating disorder as a result. It is a nightmare that I can't get out of. Nighttime is the only time I feel at peace. I wish the night never ends and the sun never rises. But that is not for long. The night is too short.


The thought of a new day makes me sick. I feel nauseous every morning when I wake up. This has really taken its toll on me. I have lost even more weight to my already underweight physic. Everything from the environment to the people makes me miserable. I loathe,hate detest,dislike the way my life is now. Why do I have to put up with all this crap? I deserve much better. Life's too short to be wasted living in misery.





*As I am typing this, I am suffering from a terrible headache but I have to resist the pain and let the suppressed feeling out before my head explodes.

The Purpose

Life would be great if you enjoy what you are doing and making the most out of it. Life can also be a bitch if you loathe what you do and you don't get what you want. Life is only meaningful if you know what's its purpose.


Sadly speaking, I failed what God sent me to earth to do. I don't even know the purpose of my life anymore. If I died today and gone to meet God, I wouldn't know how to face Him. If God asks me "Child what have you done throughout your time on earth?" I wouldn't have the answer to it.


The sad thing is I am losing myself. I don't even know who I am anymore.The opening scene in "Nanny Diaries" totally depicts my life. If I'm asked to describe myself,I wouldn't be able to do that anymore. Who am I? I really don't have the answer to that anymore. Given the old me, I could easily tell all about myself with pride and confidence.


What's life when you can't even be yourself? What's life if you can't even have a say? What's the purpose of living if you are just a puppet? What's the purpose of life when you're just a pawn in a game? The current situation that I'm in makes me loathe even myself. When I look into the mirror I don't even know who that is staring back at me.


You know you have lost the purpose of living when you don't love yourself anymore. It's fine for the world to not love you as long as you love yourself. But when you no longer love yourself, the future looks bleak.

3rd Anniversary

On the 28 May 2009, this blog turned three. I can remember clearly the very first entry of this blog. Looking back, numerous entries have been posted and I have come a long way since then.


This entry should have come up on that very day itself. However, I was caught up in a lot of things and didn't have the time to write this post. On top of that, the internet connection has been a real bitch.


One reason for the deferred entry is that my grandfather passed away a day before my blog turned 3. I was also caught up with other "commitments" apart from the funeral service which lasted a week.


In short, I didn't even have the time to rest let alone to write an entry to commemorate the anniversary/ birthday of my blog. I really loathe the lifestyle that I am leading right now. I hardly get enough sleep, neither do I eat well. On top of that, I have to hide behind a mask everyday. I truly beg to differ. I hope that things would change for the better.

Lethargy

I didn't really get much sleep last night. This is the result of me having to get up several times throughout the night to blow my nose. After clearing my airway, I snuggled back in bed trying to go back to my slumber but was unable to do so as my nose decided to be a menace. Hence resulting in me not having much sleep.

After flipping in bed for some time, I managed to go back to sleep. I was jolted out of my slumber by my parents close to noon. Apparently, they left the house with the door unlocked without realising it until they got back. All this while I was deep in my slumber. They started to scold and nagged me for not going downstairs to check. Seriously, how is it possible for a person who is asleep to go downstairs to check whether the doors are locked? They forgot to lock the doors and put the blame on me.

Throughout the day I felt lethargy. I couldn't even concentrate on reading the newspaper. After brunch, I took a nap. That didn't help much. I woke up still feeling tired and groggy. My batteries have not been recharged even though I slept in the afternoon.

Beyond Words

I have been so busy the past week that I hardly have time to log onto the internet. I am so tired from waking up early in the morning and sleeping late at night. So much has happened within a short period of time. Still need some time to get accustomed to the regime. Gone are those days where I could stay up all night and still feel energetic the next day. Suppose this is the price of growing up. Besides that, I am also deeply saddened that my Korean drama series has come to an end. No more TV hogging from my side every weekend. Wonder when I could get hold of the Boys Over Flowers DVD with English subtitles. Although I would have to say the finale was quite a let down. I have expected more from it. Why did they make the series so short? Anyway, I am happy to know that the lead actor won an award for his role in this series.

Boys Over Flowers

The cast from left to right: Kim Jun, Kim Beom, Lee Minho, Koo Hye-soen, Kim Hyun-joong




Synopsis

Jandi is a poor girl whose family runs a dry cleaning shop near the prestigious school for the affluent, Shinhwa school. One day, while delivering dry cleaning to that school, Jandi saved a student victimised by bullying from suicide and made the headlines of Korean news. In order to appease the public, Jandi was admitted into Shinhwa high school.


Jandi was just an outcast in the new school until she met the four richest spoilt boys nicknamed F4 (which stands for Flower 4). F4 is a notorious group that will make life miserable for those who retorts them. Jandi crosses path with the leader of the group when she defended her friend whom accidentally dropped ice-cream on his shoe. She was subjected to bully from the entire school after receiving a red card from F4. When the head strong Jandi could no longer tolerate the bullying, she confronted the leader, Junpyo. After that confrontation, Junpyo began to fall for her and hence begins the romance between Jandi and F4.


Cast

Koo Hye-seon as Geum Jandi
Lee Minho as Gu Junpyo
Kim Hyun-joong as Yoon Jihu
Kim Beom as So Yi Jung
Kim Jun as Sung Woo Bin




The Korean F4 behind the scene. It was winter when the show was shot. That is why the boys are "bubble wrapped". The show only wrapped shooting late 2008 and was released in Korea in January 2009 (not too sure whether it is December 2008 or January 2009). It was a hit in Korea, Japan, Indonesia, Vietnam, Philippines, and Thailand. The cast even flew over to Japan for promotional purposes. This show is worth watching as the scenery is breathtaking. The show was filmed in various locations namely New Caledonia, Macau, some ski range and all over Korea.




Lee Minho who played Gu Junpyo in the show. Junpyo is the heir of a conglomerate. He is spoilt and has a very bad temper. He is smart, good at everything he does and fluent in numerous languages but somehow he couldn't master the Korean language. However, beneath that egoistic surface, he is a loyal guy who only loves one girl. This is something that you can't find in real life; a good looking, rich, tall and loyal guy. He is not afraid to show his affection to his lover and the little things that he does really makes a girl feel pampered and loved. His portrayal of the role is convincing and you can really feel Junpyo's love for Jandi. Here Minho is looking dashing the Shinhwa school uniform. He is such an eye candy. In my opinion, he is the most good looking of the lot.




All 186 cm of Lee Minho. He is so tall. Look at those long legs. He really looks like a duke.


Some modeling shots of Lee Minho. He is a quite famous model in Korea modeling for Levi's, Dunkin Doughnuts, hand phones, cars and beer. You know a person is famous when they have an official Japanese website in addition to his official Korean website. It is said that his website crashed the moment it was launched because of the sudden surge in the massive amount of visitors. According to some websites, one side of Minho's leg has iron/steel rods in it because he was involved in a car accident back in 2006. He was bed ridden for six months and were to have the rods removed after the shooting of Boys Over Flowers wrapped. Ouch. Poor guy.





Just wanted to show an up close photo of his "curls". Only a person with his looks can pull off a hairstyle like that. In fact I think the hairstyle kind of suits him. Not the best shot though.


Kim Hyun-joong who plays Yoon Jihu in the show. The character that he portrays is a real gentleman. I like the character that he portrays but not him. I think he is very convincing in his role as a nice guy that girls love and a great musician (because he really knows how to play the piano and guitar). He is scarily fair for a guy. He is a member of the Korean band called SS501. Frankly speaking, I can't recognise him without his hair covering his face (the Jihu hairstyle).



Some other photos of Kim Hyun-joong. The Koreans say that he is handsome. I suppose that is the Korean taste. Anyway, I'm unsure whether his name is Kim Hyung-joon or Kim Hyun-joong. Some websites spell it as the first and others spell it as the second.

More shots of Kim Hyun-joong.





I think that Kim Hyun-joong resembles the winter Sonata guy, Bae Yoong jun.



Bae Yoong jun, the lead actor of Winter Sonata. See the resemblance? Anyway,the guy whom Kim Hyun-joong resembles, Bae yoong jun was nicknamed the "housewife killer" because he is the idol of housewives. I suppose that is the reason Kim Hyun-joong is a girl magnet.




This is Bae Yoong jun and not Kim Hyun-joong.

(Note: Bae Yoong Jun is not in the show. Just included his photo to show the resemblance between him and Kim Hyun-joong)



This story is based on the manga Hana Yori Dango. It can be considered a popular story for there are so many versions of TV series made based on it. There is the Taiwanese version (Meteor Garden) which made the group F4 shot to fame overnight, the Japanese version (Hana Yori Dango) and the latest to join the bandwagon is the Korean Version (Boys Over Flowers). Wonder when will the Hong Kong and English versions be made? Who will be cast for the F4 of the Hong Kong and English versions? I read that there might be a sequel to Boys Over Flowers.



This is my favourite series to date. It makes me feel like a pre-teen all over. I really envy the girl who has the unconditional love of two guys, Junpyo the loyal and romantic lover and Jihu the soulmate. I have to say the Koreans did a good job in delivering the story. It follows the manga closely and the actors have better acting skills. Not to mention that they are good looking and quite young. All of them are in their early twenties. Besides that, the songs in the show are nice too.


As crazy and fanatical as it might sound, I truly want to get hold of the DVD for Boys Over Flowers. I couldn't find it in the shops. Backward country. I missed the first part of the show as I didn't know it was aired. It is really depressing as the show is coming to an end and it is really agonizing waiting for two episodes to air per week. Haish (Junpyo's favourite phrase).