Wednesday, December 28, 2016

Customer "Service"

Read from a famous blogger regarding her blood boiling experience with horrible customer service. All of us have experienced it. Most of the time we just brush it off. Well, it doesn't make any difference whether we rage over it or complain to the manager. It never changes and nothing will be done to improve it. Just want to jot down some experiences that I have....for....research purposes (Pfffttt...).

So the internet suddenly stop functioning one day, not so long ago. Okay. It was last month to be exact. I called the service provider because well, no one wants to do it so I was forced to. I seriously hate calling all these customer service hotlines. Firstly, calling those stupid customer service number itself is already a pain in the neck. Don't get what I mean? Let me elaborate.

Ring tone......
Voice recording : Welcome to XXXXXX. For English press 1. For Bahasa press 2. For Chinese press 3. Pause. For Enquiries press 1. For Bills & Whatever Not press 2. For complaints press 3. To talk to our customer service personnel press #*!!!%&*.

You get the drift.

So anyway, back to my story. I called the service provider hotline and after slaying dragons and fighting world war 999 I got through.

TM: Good afternoon. I'm (whispering voice).

Me: Hello. My internet isn't working since last night.

TM: May I have your name....What? number.......What is your relationship with this person?

Me: (Baffled by that dumb question) I'm the relative.

Seriously, does it matter what my relationship with the person is? Is it  important? Is there like a ranking for service provided based on  relationship status?
 Like for instance :

Dato/Datin -respond time - immediate
Spouse - respond time 2-3 days,
 Mistress - respond time 5-6 days.
2nd mistress - respond time 7-8 days

I was tempted to say mistress but held back my sarcasm. I know they are just doing their job of asking dumb and totally redundant questions set by the not very bright superiors. They are just filling up the ticket of our complaints and there isn't much that they can do. But seriously! Questions like what is your relationship status with this person? What a smart and informative question. Like knowing the relationship status immediately resolves the problem on hand. The person that set this question must really have a complicated childhood or a messed up relationship (namely cheating partners) or a really fucked up family.

Continuation from the conversation.

TM: Ok miss. have you tried switching off and on the router?

Me: Yes. Multiple times.

TM: Have you tried removing the line from the splitter?

Me: Yes. Still not working.

After some donkey years of Q & As.

TM: Ok miss. We will send our service people over. If they come and check and find that the equipment is damaged by your side the cost will be borne by you. If they come and find that the fault is ours then there will be no charge.

ME: ok.

TM: Ok miss. After this call you will receive a sms which you will rate your experice with this call with 7 and above as good.

Me: ok

It was actually really smart of him to say 7 and above. Cause if he were to say 5 and above callers would have rank them starting from 5 and they would receive a low ranking of customer satisfaction.

Well, after that call, nothing happened. No one showed up. Neither did they come the following day. Internet still not working. So had no choice but to call the dreaded hotline again.

Anyway, the day after the call, I saw a van from TM parked outside the neighbour's house. So I asked the person if they are from TM (asking a question which I already have the answer to... deliberately). The guy said yes. So I told him I called their hotline and they said they would dispatch their men but no action was taken. No one showed up to "check". So that guy came in to have a "look". Literally that's all that he did. He quickly said "Oh, ini Streamyx. Saya tak tahu. Kalau Unifi saya boleh tolong. Tukarlah ke Unifi" (Translation: Oh, this is Streamyx. I don't know about it. If it is Unify, then I can help. Change to Unifi).

Sunday, December 25, 2016